Something that I’ve been observing and find so interesting lately is the concept of caring in relation to power. This goes for both relationships and friendships. It seems like whoever cares the least, has all the power in the relationship.
Ever been a situation where someone was literally obsessed with you and just cared about you so much? OK, well think about how you felt about it. Most likely you were annoyed, and thought they were clingy. You were probably very dismissive of this person and didn’t appreciate them.
This is so unfortunate, but I’ve done it too. It’s so weird! It seems like when we know we have someone wrapped around our finger, the more we feel the need to treat them like trash. God forbid someone really truly care about us!
What sucks the most is being on the other side of the spectrum (which is often me LOL FML). Caring for someone a lot, and always being there for them but they don’t appreciate you or give you the same attention.
It’s just sad, it seems like a human condition to just act this way. Is it because we know that person is always going to be there for us, so we don’t feel the need to try? But shouldn’t we love and treat that person even better BECAUSE they care so much about us?
We also need to stop acting like not caring is cool. PRETENDING like you don’t care about someone else when you actually do only makes things worse. People do it so that they can achieve power in the friendship or relationship. A healthy relationship shouldn’t have one person in power; it should be a dual partnership and dual effort. Wish we would all just stop playing so many games with one another and keep it real with our feelings. It’s not cool to be heartless.
I’ve made it my mission to notice this behavior, and actually do something about it. I want to be able to openly care about others, and have it in return. Guys who really like me, or friends that love me a lot, I’m going to really appreciate them and treat them with the same respect and care as they treat me. I am also going to notice when actions aren’t being reciprocated with someone I really care about.
Be thankful for any friendship or relationship you have where a person really cares about you. That is so hard to come by now days. You may have the power, but don’t use it for evil. Don’t mistreat or take advantage of the person because it’s wrong! Also, for the overly caring people like me, evaluate the relationships you have and make sure the effort is 50/50. Don’t let someone take advantage of your heart. I no longer will.