How NOT to get over someone

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One thing our generation LOVES to pride ourselves on is our ability to “cut someone off”. Friendships and relationships alike, as soon as shit goes left, we’re out. We always think we can find something or someone better and we pretend to move on with ease. This is not the right thing to do.

So let me just share a story about this guy I know who shall not be named. He just got out of a two-year relationship and he absolutely adored this girl. He would always bring her up in conversation. They started arguing a lot and she decided to break it off with him. He seemed really down about it, but then the next day I saw that he was on Tinder. TINDER. AFTER 1 DAY! He was swiping left and right, while telling me that he wants his old girlfriend back. (LOL) He said after a week, if she didn’t take him back he was going to move on and start hanging out with other girls. Ignoring the fact that he’s just a complete jerk, I find his actions common with a lot of people I know. People think replacing someone will help you get over them.

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Ladies and gentlemen this is HOW NOT to get over someone.

It’s not healthy to just cut someone off and keep it moving. It is definitely not fair to try and start something new with another person, when you yourself have not completely healed. Not everyone is replaceable, though millennials seem to think so.

It is important to fully have closure and to really feel the emotions of your breakup. You don’t want to get started in another relationship and carry old baggage. You must fully deal with the break up, in order to feel, find closure and then get over it.

Finding someone new to get over your ex might temporarily get your mind off that person but it still doesn’t fix that hurt you actually have inside. Let’s not be ashamed of heartbreak. If you had a deep connection with someone it’s not wrong to feel sad about it. It takes time to heal and get over someone. Without healing your past, there is no way you will have a successful future. You will just keep making the same mistakes and will not attract anything good. I know this first hand.

So, trying to get over someone?

Here’s what to do: Take time for yourself,  process the emotions, find closure, and make sure you are fully healed before you even think about starting a new relationship.

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