I never really liked the term “daddy issues”. You see, I was raised a single mother and I was completely fine with that. It was just my mom and I my whole life, our small happy family. She is truly superwoman and provided the best life possible for me. She is my everything, my world! I never had a problem growing up in a single parent household.
I used to scoff at people who would complain so much about their dad not being around…like “who cares? who needs them?” was my thought. My mom did absolutely everything on her own, and she is so strong. I grew up with the mindset that you didn’t need a man to do anything for you, or to make you happy. My mom gave me so much love that I never felt like I was missing anything or that our family was incomplete.
Now please understand that I never hated my dad, and he is and always was involved in my life. He’s a great dad. That being said, I’ve had to come to terms with the fact that as I got older I did realize that not having him around enough or being as close to him as I would’ve liked did in fact affect me. Our relationship seemed to lack that “father daughter bond”, and I never felt like I could open up to him or be honest with him.
I do recognize that my daddy issues have led me to have a lot of trust issues and this sort of inability to connect with men relationship wise. I never really saw a good healthy relationship growing up, or how you’re supposed to interact in a loving caring way with a man.
I didn’t realize until recently that I subconsciously had these feelings of resentment, feelings that definitely put a block in our relationship. It literally hit me like a ton of bricks one day.
“wow I actually want to be closer to my dad.”
The more work I did on myself the more I was able to really accept this. I never wanted to admit it, I had the perfect mother.. what more could I ask for? But she helped me become honest with myself, and see that I did have slight daddy issues and wanted a better relationship with him. I took it upon myself to release the anger and resentment and to forgive him. I wrote a long note and mustered up the courage to read it in when we were together. It was the most liberating and freeing thing I ever did. He responded quite well and was able to answer all my questions and tell me how he felt. We bonded like we never had before and I’m so thankful for that moment.
I’m blessed to have a father that truly does love me and is proud of all my accomplishments in life. I’m ready to move forward and grow in our relationship. I want to leave the past behind. I am fortunate enough that I have a father that actually does care and was willing to listen to my feelings so we can move on. I know a lot of other people don’t have fathers like that.
So if you feel like you’re dealing with daddy issues, try to acknowledge those feelings and forgive. Even if you cant physically do it or talk to your father like I was able to, try to let go of any negative feelings regarding your father. Holding onto negative emotions does way more harm then good.
I’m so happy with the place that my father and I are in today. Today is Father’s Day and I’m ready to truly enjoy it. Yes, I realized I did have some “daddy issues”, but I chose to no longer let them affect me, and the woman I am today.